::this week::

Definitely a weird week!  Jeremy is in India and I'm a mess.  We have never been apart for more than one night in the almost 6 years that we've been married, so this is quite weird for us!  Being away from Jeremy is WAY harder than I expected.  We are coming to realize just how bonded and connected we are, and exactly why we have made such a point up until now to not need to be apart for any reason.  Him being gone has been hard in ways that I didn't expect, and the ways I did expect it to be hard haven't been an issue.  I expected to actually enjoy the first few days, being an independent introvert, I thought I'd really enjoy some extra alone time and get some projects done.  Well, that has not been the case.  What I expected to be hard was caring for our son without the help and support of my teammate, but that hasn't been hard at all.  As of now, 3 days in, I'm fine until someone asks me how it's going without J here, or if I've talked to him, or when he calls me... when those things happen, I turn into a sobbing mess!!!!!

praising: additional provision for our ministry, including the possibility of a computer for Jeremy to use for work.

praying:  for spiritual and physical protection for Jeremy, Dave, and Jeff while they are in India.  for strength, health, and energy for them.  that they would be full of the Spirit and His power and that they would be used in great ways to heal the sick, encourage believers, share the Gospel, set people free, and introduce people into life transforming relationships with Jesus.

thankful for:  that prior to now, in the almost 6 years J and I have been married, we've only had to be apart for one night a total of 2 times.  in J's absence I'm acquiring a whole new sense of gratitude and appreciation for him and Noah, hoping to enjoy each moment with them to the fullest... I'm so thankful for our little family.  for all of the prayers, encouragement, and offers to help from the body of Christ while J is gone... it has been strange for me, because I'm not someone who tends to ask for help, and I tend to prefer to serve over being served, but I think it has been good for me to "let" others help and serve me, and I have surely been blessed as a result.

reading:  Psalms, Ezekiel, Nehemiah, Dare to Discipline

cooking:   all things that I love but J doesn't (while he is gone)... including lots of cabbage, cauliflower, artichokes, and olives... white bean hummus, lemon loaf cake, pumpkin cream cheese bars, zuppa toscana, buffalo cauliflower, artichoke pesto, guacamole chicken salad, chicken scallopine, Kenyan curried cabbage

doing:  missing my hubby.  dinner at the home of a different friend almost every night.  hosting a ladies board game night.  potluck at church.  coffee, play dates, meals with some sweet ladies.

pondering:  worship (still from a few weeks ago).  wondering why, in most churches I have been a part of, reading of the Bible is stressed so much to the congregation, but I've almost never heard people encouraged to worship at home or on their own.  I almost never hear of people wanting to do this aside from Sundays.  shouldn't this be a part of our community groups also?  of what we do when we, as believers, get together.  beginning to realize more and more how powerful worship is, how much the Lord ministers to me through it, how it should be a lifestyle, and not something we do at the beginning and end of each church service.  how David (the man after God's own heart) was such a worshipper.  how everything that we do should be an act of worship to God. 

Psalm 37 and the continued use of the phrase "the land" throughout it.

• v 3 live safely in...
• v 9 possess...
• v 11 the lowly will posses...
• v 22 will posses
• v 27 live in ... forever
• v 29 will posses...
• v 34 honor by giving you...

Meditating on what "the land" meant in the original time and context and what it means for me/ us today.

original:  a physical land/ the promised land... but so much more than that... a promise, a promise that took faith to accept and believe for because it seemed impossible because of the giants and current inhabitants.  a land of abundance (overflowing with milk and honey).  the Lord's will for the nation of Israel... stepping into His perfect will for them as a people... and the world.

today:  "the land" is a metaphor for the inheritance/ legacy that the Lord gives us... it represents safety (He would give them safety from their enemies), provision, experience.  I want all of what is listed in verses 3, 9, 11, 22, 27, 29, 34... I want to live safely in and posses the land/ God's perfect will for me.  I want to believe in faith and seize it when it doesn't make sense, rather than spend 40 years wandering in the wilderness because I looked at my circumstances instead of God's promises.

What is my "land"?  What promises has God made me?