Dinner Done By 9 am: The Why

I get a lot of questions and comments about my #dinnerdoneby9am that I've been using for a year so I decided to do a blog series about this concept and hopefully answer once and for all the many questions that have been asked. This first post in the series will be dedicated to explaining what #dinnerdoneby9am is, and the why behind it. I plan to do a couple more posts including more details on the how and my favorite dinner done by 9 am dinners. If you have any questions please comment on the posts and I will answer all the questions on the final post of the series.

The Why

Whatever the opposite of a procrastinator is, that is what I am. I like to do things WAY ahead of time. I start planning my friend's baby showers when they're still in the first trimester, sometimes even before they are pregnant. Why put off until tomorrow what you can do today is my mantra. I like to finish my work before I play. I like to get all of the errands, cleaning, cooking, bill paying, emailing etc. done first thing each day so that I know how much time I have to play and can be totally present while I am playing- not distracted by what I have to get done later. This helps me to be more present in those play moments enjoying the people around me. I also know from experience that in having small kids around there are always unexpected things that come up in my days. I know that 3-6 pm is the most challenging time of day with my kids. We have homework to get done and my kids are tired and cranky as bed time approaches. If I waited until the evening to get dinner done it would be a much more stressful process because there are so many people and things competing for my attention all at once. My kids are at their best, most rested and happy selves in the morning so they are more inclined to entertain themselves and need less intervention. One of my kids is also at school in the morning, so we have less people around the house all together. I am a morning person. I get up between 5 and 6 everyday ready to jump right into my day.

With this in mind, several years ago I started cooking dinner first thing in the morning. Not all meals lend themselves well to being prepared in advance but many do, especially soups, casseroles, pasta salads, curries, lasagnas, stews, chilis, even the sauce bases for warm pasta dishes can easily be prepared in advance. Anywhere from 4-7 dinners that I prepare each week are prepared ahead of time in the morning. Even dinners that can't be fully prepared ahead of time I will chop, marinate and prep for in the morning and just finish off the final cooking before we eat in the evening.

This is what works for me. You may be different. You may not be a morning person. You may be rushed to get out the door in the morning and not have extra time then (in which case if I were you I would do all of this preparing and prepping the prior evening to when I was going to eat each meal).

Stay tuned for my next post providing more details on the how and what behind #dinnerdoneby9am. If you don't want to miss the rest of the series of #dinnerdoneby9am posts follow me on social media and/ or sign up to follow my blog via email or a reader in the right column below.

Learning to put down the to do list

It all started a month ago at book club. We were discussing Year of Yes by Shonda Rhimes. One of the discussion questions I asked our book club ladies was; "What is your super power or special talent that makes you uniquely you?" Similar to a situation like this in the book, our room full of ladies had a hard time answering this about themselves. A few of us chimed in on gifts/ talents that we saw in others, but as a whole we had a hard time owning the goodness within ourselves. I thought long and hard about myself and the only thing I could come up with was #dinnerdoneby9am. (This is the hash tag I use to capture all of the dinners I am able to have prepared prior to 9 am). But I wasn't satisfied with that answer. I wanted to have an answer that was deeper and more meaningful.

A few days later I explained this scenaraio to Jeremy and asked for his thoughts, knowing he would have better insight than me. He explained to me that #dinnerdoneby9am is not my super power. That it is a product of my super powers. That my super power is who I am and how I was created, and that #dinnerdoneby9am is something I do. I started thinking about how I am a doer and how as a doer I (incorrectly) tend to assign worth and value to myself and others based on what we do. If asked to tell someone about myself or my day I would probably give you a long list of things that I do or did. I place high value on doing.

Fast forward two weeks. Jeremy and I were having a meeting for our ministry. Discussing what we had going on, where God was giving us favor, what doors He was opening up, and where we should invest our efforts currently. In this meeting we decided to cut two major projects that I had been putting a lot of time and energy into. These were big projects. Projects for me to do. Projects I was proud of. Over the course of the meeting we decided to put both of these projects on hold- maybe for now, maybe permanently. We realized that these projects were a result of striving, of us trying to make things happen ourselves rather than following the favor and open doors that God had given us. Everytime that we've tried to make things happen on our own it has always flopped. But when we simply follow the favor that God gives us He has dropped amazing opportunities in our laps. Opportunities that we weren't even aware of. Opportunities that were so much better than the things we had tried to do on our own. So this is how we've agreed to operate. Follow favor. In this meeting, once we decided to put these projects on hold I started sobbing. It was a deep painful sob. I don't think Jeremy or I really understood why I was so upset. In talking and processing it became clear that I was finding my value and worth in what I was doing and that when those things were put on hold I instantly felt inadequate. Not enough. Small. Unimportant. It was clear that I was finding my worth through what I did.

As I didn't fully get the lesson from those two interactions God continued to gently nudge me on this topic of doing. A few days later I sat down to spend some one-on-one time with Him. I started journaling some prayers to Him and found myself apologizing for various things that I hadn't been doing enough of lately. Not praying enough. Not reading my Bible enough. Not doing enough 'spiritual' things. And I realized that this doing mentality was seeping into my relationship with God also. I was like Martha, putting a higher value on all of the things I was doing for Him rather than just freely being with Him.

1 Corinthians 13 gives us a good warning about just how futile doing a bunch of stuff is if we're not doing it out of love. If we're doing stuff to earn or prove our worth then we aren't doing it freely out of love. We are then doing from striving, stress, pressure. If we do stuff to earn our worth we are undermining what Jesus did on the cross. We are inadvertently saying that what Jesus did was not enough. We are trying to work for what we have been freely given.

So in the midst of all these lessons I hear God speaking Psalm 46:10 "...Be still, and know that I am God" over and over again to my heart.

Be still and know. One translation says cease striving. Being still is not something that comes easily for me. My first instinct and reaction is always to do. To take a step. To do the next thing. But I hear God telling me in this season to stop. To wait. To be still. To know. To sit at His feet like Mary.

I thought I had learned this lesson and gotten over this doing mentality eight years ago when I had quit my job in the corporate world managing hundreds of people. I had given up the suits, the business cards and the title. I thought at that point in time I had learned the hard lesson of not identifying myself by what I do. That my value isn't a list of actions or accomplishments. But apparently there was still a remaining layer of this issue to work through lingering from years earlier. I may have no longer been finding my worth in my career, but I found other avenues of things I did and accomplished to find my value in.

In this season of my life, in which I am a stay-at-home mom first and foremost, if I define myself by what I do I will literally feel like a combination of a milk factory cow and a janitor because I nurse my baby, wipe little behinds and clean up messes all day long. I do thousands of seemingly mundane tasks that I have to do all over again the next day.  This means that if I don't learn the lesson of finding my identity in Christ rather than in what I do that I will be left feeling extremely underutilized.

I tend to measure my days by the number of items crossed off on my to do list. The problem with that is that the most meaningful moments of each day are not found on to do lists. The meaningful moments are found in relationship and connection. In kissing boo boos, reading books, conversations, hugs, snuggles, in being still and silent enough to hear God speak . This is the good stuff. When I'm caught up in do mode, racing to check off all of my tasks I tend to miss those moments. In do mode I don't notice the sounds of little feet running up and down my halls. The kind words of one brother to another. The "I wuve you momma, you're sweet" whispered to me by a toddler. The look in my husband's eyes when we all snuggle together on the couch at the end of the day. These are the moments that I don't want to miss.

No career, title, relationship, status, possession, accomplishment or accolade is meant to fulfill us or define us. We are not the sum of these things. These things will always leave us unsatisfied; searching, striving, comparing and performing for more.

The truth is that I am not defined by what I do. My value doesn't increase or decrease based on my actions or what I accomplish. My worth has been solidified by Christ's death on the cross. By what He says about me and who He created me to be. That I am created in His image. That I am a child of God. That I am loved. Whole. Chosen. God's special possession. Righteous. Forgiven. A new creation. Fearfully and wonderfully made.

The truth is that I am not the sum of what I do. I am the sum of what He did.

And all of that goes for you as well dear reader.

We are defined by the fact that God loved us so much that He became flesh. Came to earth. Died. Rose and defeated death so that we could be in right standing with Him. Fully restored. This is what He says we are worth. Whether we do another thing for Him or not, this has been decided.

So let's sit back and take a big deep breath together. Let's be still and know. And then once we really know deep in our hearts that we are enough, that we are worthy, that we are valued, loved and cherished just as we are, then we can do from a place of freedom. From a place of confidence in who God created us to be and who we are in Him; now, and eternally.

Turmeric Roasted Cauliflower

Turmeric Roasted Cauliflower

This recipe is slightly adapted from the Skinnytaste Cookbook. This was amazing. Even my non-cauliflower liking husband said he could eat this once a week, and that says a lot! This is so simple to prepare and yet has the most deep, sophisticated, complex flavor. This will be a regular at house.

-1 large head cauliflower, cut into florets

-1/4 cup olive oil

-1 tsp turmeric

-1 tsp cumin

-1 tsp salt

-1/4 tsp red pepper flakes

-2 Tbsp chopped cilantro

Whisk together olive oil, turmeric, cumin, salt and red pepper flakes. Toss oil mixture with cauliflower. Roast cauliflower at 450 from 20-30 minutes, stirring after 15 minutes.

Berry Ricotta Cake

Berry Ricotta Cake

This is slightly adapted from a Molly Wizenberg/ Orangette recipe, which was slightly adapted from a Bon Appetit recipe. In some the reviews people mentioned adding lemon zest or almond extract to this cake and I am super eager to try each of these additions individually, but wanted to make the cake as is once first. I used a combination of frozen blackberries and frozen cherries but think this cake would be great with frozen mixed berries, blackberries or raspberries. I doubled the berries from Molly's recipe and next time I might even increase the amount to 3 cups. Other than that I LOVE this cake. It is so easy to throw together and comes out so delicious and moist!

-1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
-1 cup sugar
-2 teaspoons baking powder
-¾ teaspoon salt
-3 eggs
-1 ½ cup ricotta
-½ teaspoon vanilla extract
-1 stick butter, melted
-2 cups frozen berries, divided


Preheat the oven to 350°F. Lightly grease a 9-inch round cake pan, and press a round of parchment paper into the bottom.

In a large bowl, whisk the flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt. In a medium bowl, whisk the eggs, ricotta, and vanilla until smooth. Gently stir ricotta mixture into the dry ingredients until just blended. Then fold in the butter, followed by 1 1/2 cup of the berries, taking care not to crush them. Scrape the batter into the prepared pan, smoothing it evenly, and scatter the remaining berries on top.

Bake the cake until it is golden brown and a toothpick inserted into the center comes out clean, 50 to 60 minutes. Let cool at least 20 minutes before unmolding. Cool completely before serving.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Bars

Chocolate Peanut Butter Bars

These are Pat's Bars from the book Kitchens of the Great Midwest. The only change I made was to increase the amount of chocolate and change to semi-sweet rather than milk chocolate. These bars are super easy to throw together and taste like a giant Reese's cup.

-2½ cups crushed graham cracker crumbs
-1 cup melted Grade A butter

-1 cup peanut butter

-2½ cups powdered sugar

-2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips with 2 tsp. Grade A butter

Mix together the graham cracker crumbs, 1 cup melted butter, peanut butter and sugar. Pat into a greased 9 x 13-inch pan. Melt the chocolate chips and 1 tsp. butter and spread on top of the bars. Refrigerate until firm. Cut into bars.

Chewy Granola Bars

Chewy Granola Bars

I got this recipe from a fellow MOPS momma. It is super easy to throw together and made with ingredients that I always have on hand.

-3 cups oats
-1 cup flour
-1 t. baking soda
-2 t. vanilla
-2/3 cup butter, melted
-½ cup honey
-1/3 cup brown sugar
-1 cup chocolate chips
-(optional) 1 cup raisins
-(optional) 1 cup pecans

In a large bowl, combine oats, flour, and baking soda. In another bowl, combine vanilla, butter, honey, and brown sugar; add to oat mixture and stir until combined. Fold in the chocolate chips and raisins, and pecans (if using). Pour into a lightly greased 9x13 pan. Lightly press mixture into the pan with the back of your spoon. Bake at 325 for 22 minutes or until lightly golden brown. Let cool for 10 minutes then cut into bars. Let bars cool completely in pan before removing or serving.

Pork and Tomatillo Stew

Pork and Tomatillo Stew

Our book club read Tender at the Bone so for our discussion night I was charged with providing Ruth's Pork and Tomatillo Stew for our main dish. I started with her recipe, but ended up making a lot of changes, so here is my take on her dish.

-1/4 cup canola or vegetable oil

-salt and pepper for sprinkling on the pork

-1 2-3 lb pork loin, trimmed and cut into bite sized chunks

-2 onions, diced

-2 jalapenos, diced

-8 cloves garlic, minced

-1 (29 oz) can diced tomatoes

-1 (29 oz) can tomatillos, drained and diced

-2 cups chicken broth

-2 cups orange juice

-2 Tbsp cumin

-1 tsp oregano

-1 Tbsp sugar

-1/2 tsp salt

-1/2 tsp black pepper

-1-4 Tbsp hot sauce

-2 cans black beans, rinsed and drained

-1 can hominy, drained

-juice of 1 lime

-1 bunch cilantro, chopped

-toppings of choice; sour cream, hot sauce, cotija cheese, diced avocado, diced radishes, cilantro...

Heat the oil in a large pot, over medium heat. Sprinkle the pork with salt and pepper and add to the pot. Cook for a few minutes until browned on one side and stir. Add onions, jalapenos and garlic. Cook an additional 2-3 minutes. Add tomatoes- hominy. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer for 20 minutes. Remove from heat, add cilantro and lime juice and serve with your desired toppings.